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The Philosophy of Bean - De File
Does Collecting Make You Feel Dirty?
cbertsch
cbertsch
The Philosophy of Bean
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elizabeg From: elizabeg Date: September 2nd, 2005 04:04 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
You know, I know I hit on that in high school but...

I mean, I think I hit on it before when I was writing my novels and whatnot, making my parents write them for me. But I really wish in some ways they had better documenting of my 6-year-old ways of having seen the world.
_luaineach From: _luaineach Date: September 2nd, 2005 04:35 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
really wish in some ways they had better documenting of my 6-year-old ways of having seen the world.

I was very lucky in that my mom was a great journaler and so not only kept journals for us (until we could write) but encouraged the use of our own (once we could write). I still have stacks of journals from when I was 8, 12, 15... I think that ability to connect with yourself is vital to the development of consciousness. (And besides that, they are hilarious to read now. :) )

It's in great part why I do so much journaling with my own son. He has journals of his own words/thoughts/views/ramble/"I like blue"/etc. that I would transcribe for him dating back to when he was 2.5 and they are a consistent fascination for him. Particularly in just *practical* areas, as well: Looking back at what was on his mind when he was 3 and a half and seeing how he feels about it now, how his opinion is different (or not), why it is different (or not); the ability for him to see in a concrete fashion his own words about things he thought at one time insurmountable ("I will never be able to dribble a basketball because it's too hard") and that now he does without a second thought -- giving rise to the full body belief that things he thinks insurmountable *now* are merely things he "can't do yet." Seeing it in his own words truly has an effect more powerful than my just *telling* him "oh, when you were three you used to think....". Even just seeing visible comparison of things like how his handwriting improved, or his drawing... Growth, growth, growth... not as an "abstract" "now I'm taller" idea but as a right there in front of you example of "look at how my thoughts have become more complex". I think it's vitally important that children (or anyone) be able to have that ability to again and again reference back to themselves. [to quote a David Zindell book] "consciousness reflected upon itself, gaining ever more control of itself and creating new forms."

art_thirst From: art_thirst Date: September 2nd, 2005 07:03 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
I had journals from about jr. high school age but, one my father took and who knows where it is today. On 1 January of whatever year it was, I just wrote several times how much I hated my father and how I wished him dead. It took him years (after I moved away from home and on to another city) and the death of my mother for him to mellow and reach out to me. I do have stuff from high school though, when I wanted to be a poet. :-)
_luaineach From: _luaineach Date: September 2nd, 2005 07:37 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
I do have stuff from high school though, when I wanted to be a poet. :-)

ah ha ha, I have a lot of those, too. They make for blushingly-funny reads. My particular favorites for some reason, though, are the ones from *middle* school. In addition to journals from that period, I have a bunch of notebooks in which my best friend at the time and I wrote notes to each other in -- as opposed to "passing notes" individually, we would just write to each other in a notebook and pass it back and forth. Reading them now, all I can say is Ugh (and also a laugh out loud). While the highschool ones are all more about 'intellectual angst' (oh i'm a nihilist, oh i'm an existentialist), those ones from age 12-13 are just examples of the hideous full body *real* angst that comes with puberty. Could we have talked any more about boys? Could we have been any cattier about the girls we hated? Could we have been any more obviously searching, scrambling, *seeking* for identity? I thank whatever lucky stars that in all my years of lugging that stuff around from city to city that I never, in a fit of organizing or paring down, tossed that stuff as irrelevant. It fascinates me.

and I'm also thinking now how effective *they* might be as 'teaching tool' as my son ages. Again, how much more effective to answer his teen years "you just don't *understand*" statements by handing him words from my own mouth when I was the same age? We will have a direct correlation of issues, I'm sure, being male/female, but some things remain the same.....
_luaineach From: _luaineach Date: September 2nd, 2005 07:39 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
"We will "not" have a direct correlation", that should say.
art_thirst From: art_thirst Date: September 2nd, 2005 10:02 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
In some ways, I think having children realize in that way that their parents were in the same situation would be helpful and understanding. Mine were also in the existentialist, nihilist, hedonist vein but, the poetry was more grappling with my own intellect and how I wanted to expand my mind. Kids today seem to not want to be known by anything intellectual unless they're involved in program where it's encouraged. But, picking up a book and reading to actually learn something that isn't be taught in school... I don't know too many like that. Just telling my college students to use the library instead of web surfing gets the eyes rolling. However, since most of them actually did go and check out library books is a good sign for the semester. ;-))

Also, I have to admit my love of poetry came from my grandmother and mother reading poetry to us cousins when we were probably 5-6-7 yrs. old. I found it absolutely mind-blowing that a person could take the words we use everyday and turn them into something so magical and fantastic. :-)
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