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Fear - De File
Does Collecting Make You Feel Dirty?
cbertsch
cbertsch
Fear
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From: e4q Date: February 15th, 2006 12:39 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
i watched someone drown once. they were far away, but we had shouted and they had shouted back, so we were the last people to communicate with him. we stood and stared at the water for ages afterwards, but the thames is a big old tidal monster, and he was gone. it was the day after the timothy mcveigh execution, and i had been listening on the radio about people who were for the death penalty and against but who were both going to witness it. i had idly wondered what difference it might make to witness a death of someone you didn't know. this guy was quite far out, you couldn't see his face, so it was the least possible witness i could have experienced, but i still felt sick afterwards, and went all shivery. it was like my head was a vulcan, (hmm, fascinating) but my body was very visceral about it.
kdotdammit From: kdotdammit Date: February 15th, 2006 02:02 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
I saw a house burn and a boy drown when I was a kid. Both experiences terrified me. Last night's experience terrified me too.
From: e4q Date: February 15th, 2006 02:45 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
i'm not bloody surprised. so close to home, and bringing up those other memories. quite apart from fire being way in front of anthropological as a fear
cbertsch From: cbertsch Date: February 15th, 2006 02:10 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
I hope I never have to watch something like that. I've been lucky so far. I've seen the wreckage from terrible auto accidents, but only a fair piece after the happened. I've seen a few accidents happen, but none in which anyone was seriously hurt. Your description of a mind-body split is very vivid and reminds me of less serious experiences I've had where I noticed something similar. Indeed, I often feel like someon with a Vulcan head and a human body.
From: e4q Date: February 15th, 2006 02:49 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
well, it was interesting, but, like you, i had only seen aftermaths or near misses. when humans have died i have never been that near, even my first kitty was at the vets and was put down in my absence. i had a cat who died while i was in the bath, and i talked to her for about an hour afterwards. i am glad i did that, because it was soon after that that i found out that not all the senses die at once, and that hearing is the last to go.
cbertsch From: cbertsch Date: February 15th, 2006 06:46 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
Wow. That's really interesting. And sad. I'll remember that about the senses.
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