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De File
Does Collecting Make You Feel Dirty?
Tingle and Sweat
A honeybee or yellow jacket flew into my office a few minutes ago. Since I'm terribly afraid of stinging insects, I'm doing my best to pretend that it's not a threat. Yet even though I'm staring intently at the monitor and listening hard to Richard Hell, my whole body is pricked with anxiety. Maybe that's not the music to be listening to right now, considering that I also have a fear of needles -- my beloved mentor Julian Boyd used to say that I was clearly afraid of slow penetration, since a sting takes longer than a stick -- but I have to talk to Hell on the phone this evening and need to fill my head with as much of his art and life as I can in order to be able to improvise during our conversation. OK, I'm going to be brave and scan the room for that infernal creature. It's circling inside the upside-down plastic lampshade of my IKEA-purchased source of incandescent light. And I can see its silhouette, which relaxes me just enough to lean back in my chair for the first time since I started writing this. But my neck is still in knots and I have damp droplets on my forehead.

Tags: , ,
Current Location: 85721
Mode: green-fleshed
Muse: Love Comes In Spurts - Richard Hell & The Voidoids - Spurts: The Richard Hell Story

6 comments or Leave a comment
masoo From: masoo Date: July 26th, 2006 09:26 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
Dos palabras ...

You're better than me ... I'm terribly afraid of all insects, stinging or not. If a bee flies into my office, I can't work until it's disposed of in some way.

Meanwhile, my rss feed gave me the initial version of your post, which I see you have corrected. Both versions, while different, made me stop for a second, though. It's the sentence that begins "Maybe that's not the music ...." in the "original" version, after the parenthetical-via-dashes aside, which put Julian in mind, you wrote "but I have to talk to him on the phone this evening" and I thought, well, that's going to be an interesting conversation, I wonder how Charlie got Julian's new phone number. Then I came to make this comment, and saw you'd clarified the point in question. But it's still pretty funny, and perhaps not as different as you might imagine: "but I have to talk to Hell on the phone this evening."

Of course, none of this will make sense if you edit it again before I hit "Post Comment" ...
cbertsch From: cbertsch Date: July 26th, 2006 09:37 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)

I'm so glad you caught that! Antecedents will fuck you up worse than heroin. Of course, drug addiction is an infinite regress of antecedents.

I sure wish I could talk to Julian on the phone, wherever he is.
xxxpunkxgrrlxxx From: xxxpunkxgrrlxxx Date: July 27th, 2006 12:22 am (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
old punk rules.
cbertsch From: cbertsch Date: July 27th, 2006 12:30 am (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
And part of the reason is that old punks won't let you use that word lightly! If I speak it to Hell tonight, I'm going to have to insulate it with quotation marks. Even if he is regarded by a great many as a "punk icon," I don't think he is happy with the designation.
derdriu From: derdriu Date: July 27th, 2006 07:36 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
Empty cups.
My housemates used to laugh at me for the plethora of empty cups I kept leaving around the house, but in times of insect crisis, they ate their words. Wait until the bug has landed somewhere, and slam the cup over it. Then you know where it is, it can't escape and someone else can get rid of it later (or you can slide paper under it and toss it out somewhere that is not your space).

Also, I'm terribly afraid of spiders, and despite my shaking fear of them this tactic has worked many a time.
cbertsch From: cbertsch Date: July 27th, 2006 10:05 pm (UTC) (LINK TO SPECIFIC ENTRY)
Excellent idea!
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