It may be a cliché to say that you won't know what you've got until it's gone, but that doesn't mean that the feelings of loss are any less felt. I talked with two friends on the phone today, one who has already left for a greener world and another who is likely to follow. I'm happy for them, since there's only so much psychological desiccation a person can take before the reasons for hope dry up in the sun. But I don't particularly like the sensation of abandonment. Now if I could just figure out a way to excise the overly mental aspect of that sensation, so that I might inhabit the "gone" myself, the veil of brown might lift from my own sight.